Enough of this new reality





Ok so this post is a little different from anything else I’ve written about, but having a teenage daughter, it’s something that is really driving me nuts right now.


On a weekly basis, I read about celebrities being trolled and bullied online and I don’t condone this in any way, but I really can’t help wondering if occasionally they leave themselves wide open for criticism. 

There’s a huge difference between criticism and bullying so I really want to make it clear I in no way want to cross that boundary. I read things and see a lot of these videos on YouTube that just slaughter people in the public eye just to get video clicks. 

This week I’ve seen a lot of stuff about Kendal Jenner, who as far as I can see, tends to be ambushed for breathing and it makes me feel really uncomfortable, knowing this girl suffers anxiety obviously strikes a chord with me and when you see someone just being picked at for every project they take on or every person they date, that does roll over to bullying and isn’t ok. People have to make a living and some are lucky enough to do that by doing something they love, but I do think that if you make the decision to put yourself into the public eye then you really have to take into consideration the influence and responsibility you have over other young people. 


There are certain celebrities who have spawned their careers from reality shows such as Towie and Geordie Shore, they all started out as pretty girls and love them or hate them brought different dimensions to our favourite weekly viewing. 

I have watched them all and my current reality show of choice is Keeping Up With The Kardashian’s. 

I love it. 

Seriously can’t get enough. My love of reality tv started in 2000 with the launch of Big Brother, so this isn’t a moan about reality tv. It does have its place, (usually on my tv on a Sunday night) and I think in some ways these shows can really promote a great work ethic. 


Look at Samantha Faiers, ok, she has a reality show, but she’s a great example of a young girl meeting her partner and having a young family but still working her backside off to have a career and nice things. She has multiple projects going on while raising a family. I think that’s a great thing to be seeing on tv. It's the side of reality-based celebrities that I want my kids to see and learn from. Not particularly the tv part, but then you have to work her to have nice things. 

But there is a flip side. The side I don't want my kids watching and aspiring to be like. 

With some of these celebs, when you follow their Instagram and social media pages, you can’t pay any attention to what they may be doing to make a nice life for themselves and to succeed because the only thing you can see is these huge, quite unpleasant lips. 

These girls could be raising thousands of pounds for charity and you wouldn't really know because you can't see past the images in front of you. 

They appear on daytime tv and say they’d never have a boob job because natural is best and then a year down the line they are sporting Katie Price sized boobs. 


You get all the stories they are putting out on a daily basis about how hard they have worked to achieve their new ass, and it is starting to go from silly to utterly ridiculous. 

You didn’t work for that ass, you maybe worked to pay for it, but trying to tell your followers you work out to look this ”good” is extremely irresponsible. Young girls generally don’t have enough life experience to realise they are being fed lies and they then want to achieve this unrealistic goal that’s being shoved down their throats. 


I’m all for bettering ourselves and I’m not opposed to one day if I ever have enough money getting work done. But when it goes from having a little bit of Botox or a boob job because the twins have suffered through three kids and are now at knees to having lip fillers to the point of looking utterly ridiculous then I think I understand why some people can throw the hurtful comments in their direction. 

It looks awful, it’s irresponsible in every way and I have started to understand the frustration of seeing this every day. While I’m not bombarding these girls with hateful words, and wouldn't, in all honesty, the things I’m thinking aren’t aren’t that nice. I have at times thought why do the friends and family of these people not tell them they look crazy? I would expect someone to have a word if I ever got so disillusioned with what beauty is. 


I can see why parents of young kids get so annoyed that they take to the keyboard and let loose because these images that our kids are seeing are creating a new kind of normal for them to feel pressured into achieving.

 

Give these kids a fighting chance, because, for every duck lip photo I see, I read an article from someone further down the road in their celebrity journey telling us how miserable they felt. How they felt like they had to look a certain way to be successful. When are we going to stop seeing success being portrayed in how big their ass or lips are and start learning about what they are doing behind the makeup and superficially nonsense. When are we going to read about real, normal life and how to achieve that?

Now, in my 30s, my celebrities of choice are down to earth, hardworking women. 


Giovanni Fletcher is the best example of the kind of women I’d love my children to strive to become. 

Her social media is occasionally a glam dress and a night out, but on an average day it’s about family life and working damn hard to provide for her kids. She’s really showing that actually, you can be in the public eye, you can have fame and money but the way to do it is to work hard and not lose sight of what matters. 

Money and fame are only going to take anyone so far and if it takes an unhealthy, unrealistic body to achieve this then does that even equate to being successful anyway? 


What I have started to do now is to just unfollow these stars. Stop having these images on my feeds and support the people I feel are showing a healthier lifestyle. I’d like to think that unfollowing these people are the better option to throwing cruel comments at them, and there’s no need for unfounded nasty behaviour towards anyone, we all make mistakes and can look back with a wiser mind but please, someone, take a bit of a stand and flip around the crazy trends that undoubtedly encourage these comments in the first place. 


If I thought it would make a difference I’d be campaigning myself to have more of the achievable or inspirational on my tv and less of the stupidity.

I am just a plain jane mum of two humans, so my opinion doesn't count much, I just hope one day I have two girls who have a bigger voice than mine and who know how to use to spread a better message than the ones I'm seeing them bombarded with every day.  


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